Every time I find myself going down a wrong road, my first reaction is to justify it by saying its not wrong. My second action (after realizing it is wrong) is to justify myself by putting on a mask of innocence. The mask wears off, the grief sets in.
Grief is to the spirit what pain is to the body. When we sin we hurt ourselves. We have two ways to remedy the pain of our spirit. By covering it with pride or by healing it with repentance.
To heal we must deal with our mistake and thus annihilating our pride or justification. The Lord is happy when are hearts are sincere and open, not hiding, withholding or in denial about our fallen state. Our hearts will grow cold, hard, unforgiving and unloving if we aren't careful. We must let our hearts be open and soft because then we are receptive to the Lord and then He can heal us of our sins. The scriptures say to "offer for sacrifice unto the Lord a broken heart and contrite spirit." Thats the only offering He will accept. He doesn't take money, objects, lies, or lip service. He wants the heart and spirit. Interesting insight into whats really valuable in life.
We must be closed to the evil influences but open to the good. Our hearts must be open, but not stupid. We must seek the Spirit for guidance, but not accept an evil spirit. Our hearts must be soft but our determination strong. Satan would have us to have hard hearts and loose morals. This is quite the contrast of the two roads we are to choose from.
The promised prizes for choosing between good and evil are similar in definition but drastically different in application-
-The Lord promises all that He has. Satan promises all the riches of this world.
-The Lord grants us complete freedom from the bondage of sin if we follow Him. Satan grants us the freedom to follow our appetites and passions as he chains us to them until we lose our free will.
-The Lord would have us realize that every hair on our heads are numbered and that we are His most precious creations; giving us a world to have joy therein through our prosperity and development into being more like Him. Satan would have us think that the world is nothing more than a place for us to use and abuse and everyone is just objects for self gratification.
Both God and Satan promise riches, freedom, satisfaction and kingdoms. But, of course one is correct and the other a liar.
Satan lies to us, tricking us into valuing falsehoods ourselves. Tricking us into thinking that we are so great, as we build houses upon the sand "And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it." 3 Nephi 14:27.
This is why repenting is so difficult; we want to say good is evil and evil is good. Isaiah commented and gave a warning to those that do that- "Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!" 5:20.
As we repent our hearts swell with love for God. When we stop repenting, we stop swelling and eventually our hearts grow hard and cold again. We must endure to the end with increasing in humility and love for the Lord.
The Lord will not tolerate our sins but He will tolerate paying for them. Often its hard to let go of our mistakes because we often want to pay for them ourselves (if at all), but thats not the Lord's way. The key to repentance is humility. He wants to pay for them, because only He can, but, only we can let Him. The Lord is mighty. He wants us to trust Him because he is the great Healer but only by our faith in Him. How do we gain that faith? By letting Him take undeserved responsibility for the sins, relieving you from them on your conscience. In return, you follow His Holy Spirit and keep His commandments the rest of your life. That is the only way to repent. It works. It gives you peace, love, hope, strength, wisdom, knowledge, freedom, and your world back.
