When to Follow, When to Lead

We have a realm of responsibility. When we try to control things outside of that realm we fall from firm ground. The Alcoholics Anonymous members have a prayer called the Serenity prayer that says:

"God, Give us the grace to accept with serenity
the things that cannot be changed, Courage
to change the things which should be changed,
And the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other."

The distinction of when to follow and when to lead is essential for us to gain so that we may not stretch ourselves too thin or too little. We shouldn't try to control too much and we shouldn't be irresponsible over too little. But the question is how do we know what is within our power and what is not only out of our reach but none of our business?

My wife and I live in an apartment downtown. We had a neighbor move in 2 months after we did. We got along good with him and frequently had chats as we saw him walking his dogs. Then we began to smell smoke in our apartment daily. We told the manager of this and they talked to our neighbor. We also started hearing loud music and yelling from our neighbor after hours and have often been woken up by him in the night. One night we felt it necessary to call the cops. Since then we have had a hard time feeling comfortable in that apartment. He frequently mocks us as he walks by our place and lulls us into arguments about his behavior. We now are trying to get him evicted and/or move away. Right now our management is looking into this and how to best quell the situation. We're very upset.

Now, our responsibility isn't to try and control our neighbor's choices in life. But, we do have a responsibility to make sure that our boundaries are respected. Our neighbor has crossed the line of our privacy. Once he has done that then it is in our responsibility to make sure he follows the rules which are affecting us. He must follow and we must lead. If we were the ones who cause the offense then we must learn to follow the rules. We have taken steps to ensure his irresponsible behavior is dealt with by contacting authorities such as our landlords, the police, and possibly a lawyer. It would be inappropriate and crossing the line for us to reach beyond the laws and take matters into our own hands and try to physically kick him out ourselves. We must follow the laws and policies of the authorities. They must lead and we must follow. We cannot overstep our bounds and think to run the system on the whim of our own personal feelings. That would be out of our realm of responsibility. We must leave it up to the authorities to deal with this by the law and if they fail then we must do what we can to make sure our boundaries aren't disrespected. That might mean moving away or appealing to higher authorities. A church history example of this would be when the saints crossed the plains from the East to settle in the West to escape the persecution. First the saints appealed to the government by the laws of freedom of religion and the right to live safely but we're ignored.

I think an easy answer to the question of when to follow and when to lead would be to follow the Holy Ghost's promptings. Often thats not easy when our thoughts, wants, or feelings cloud our judgment. It is God's realms of responsibility to answer us when we ask with real intent. But, it is our realm of responsibility to not overstep our boundaries in what we are asking. He says "Whatsoever ye ask the Father in my name it shall be given unto you, that is expedient for you; and if ye ask anything that is not expedient for you, it shall turn unto your condemnation” DC 88:64-65.

Often we must pray to God for an answer or help. Often we must act and follow the laws of the land and of God. Often God is giving us a chance to grow by the adversity of dealing with those who overstep their boundaries, offend us, mock, or challenge us. It is our responsibility to return good for evil. It is our opportunity to forgive and have patience. It is our time to follow God and lead our way to Him when all falls against us. We must always follow the Lord. We must always lead ourselves away from the harm of evil.

Sensitivity

In the Church we talk a lot about things you should and shouldn't do. In the world, we are bombarded with messages about what to buy, what to think, what to do, how to sleep, what to eat etc. However deafening the messages may seem there is a still small voice we all must adhere to.

When Elijah was fleeing for his life from the wicked Phoenician princess Jezebel, the Lord directed him to a high mountain, where he had a most unusual experience. As Elijah stood upon the mount before the Lord, he felt “a great and strong wind … ; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: and after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice” (1 Kgs. 19:11–12).

We often think an all powerful God must only speak through natural disasters or great plagues or wars etc. but as all powerful He is, He knows that we are all individuals and He will not take away our right to choose. So, the war for our hearts is the one He is fighting and even though there may be missionaries all over the globe or loud preachers or strong political pressures, He talks to us through a "still, small voice." He is sensitive to our hearts.
When the resurrected Christ visited His people in the Americas -

it came to pass that the multitude went forth, and thrust their hands into his side, and did feel the prints of the nails in his hands and in his feet; and this they did do, going forth one by one until they had all gone forth, and did see with their eyes and did feel with their hands, and did know of a surety and did bear record, that it was he, of whom it was written by the prophets, that should come. (3 Nephi 11:15).


He says, “I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him.” (Rev. 3:20.) He is a gentle, patient, and loving Person who comes to each of us individually, "one by one". He won't take away our right to choose, whether its to listen and open the door or to not. He won't break down the door or yell to make Himself known. This still small voice is heard through the ears of our spirit. Its found in our hearts of hearts.

This power to choose is known as agency. "Men have power to be agents unto themselves."- D&C 58: 28. It might be a hard thing to realize because we're constantly being asked to live one way or another. But, this is probably the most empowering message we can learn if we wish to be happy- men have power to be agents unto themselves. Sometimes we forget it and get caught up in something that can potentially hurt others. We must be careful how we use our agency for with the use of this power we will be judged before God. I'm always impressed to think of this scripture from the Savior when I think of God's judgment-

Matthew 25:33-40
And he shall set the sheep on his aright hand, but the goats on the left.
Then shall the King say unto them on his aright hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?
When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?
Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

So, it is imperative that we use our agency with sensitivity to the Spirit of the Lord. For the Spirit of the Lord teaches us that we must "yield to the enticings of the Holy Spirit ... and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father." (Mosiah 3:19)

The Spirit is full of Love for others. If we are sensitive to the Lord we will be sensitive to others. This is a HUGE part of being a true follower of the Lord Jesus Christ. Although, He spoke with authority it was always with love. I know that everything God does is out of love for us for He has said "For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man. " (Moses 1:39). He works for us. His whole purpose is to make sure we're happy and delivered from the bondage of Satan. I say if the Lord does it, then we must do it. If He is forgiving so should we be forgiving. If He loves unconditionally then so should we. That is what being a Mormon and a true follower of God is all about. If we do not the things of God then we are not of God and won't be with God. I love Heavenly Father and I know that He loves us and will do anything to make sure we are happy and free. This is the purpose of this blog and my life, to follow God and be like Him as much as I can. I know anyone who does this will find a multitude of wisdom, freedom, hope, love, and purpose.

There is a great quote by Joseph Smith that says "If my life is of no value to my friends, then it is of no value to me." He said this right before his martyrdom when persecution against the Mormons was at a peak and it was hard to find loyal friends. He didn't abandon them or the church and was killed by a mob for his testimony of the divinity of the church and book of Mormon. He truly gave his life for his friends.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13

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